Problem Child

Lord, I have found your divine rapture.
It runneth over my linens
and formed a thin crust come dawn.
Your messenger ministered well,
her testimony was honest and loud
and kept my roommates up all night.
Those who seek to expand themselves
lie prostrate before your power
and in a human pretzel on the couch
and the floor and bed and shower
and sometimes my roommates’ beds
or in the stairwell nearest the laundry room;
in pick-up truck and sedan alike,
both day and night,
for everywhere is your domain.

But Lord, why do those whom you send
to speak your words and evangelize
so often bear gifts through human touch
firmly secured over moistened genitals?
Certainly it is the hand of God we seek
rummaging through flannel boxers,
as is the Creation so too is the Creator.
I thank you for this bountiful gift before me,
though she may finish second.

- Daniel Anderson